If you want to have a rewarding and successful career, the most valuable skill you could ever learn is how to listen effectively. Listening skills are also the key to developing strong, lasting relationships in your personal life. Your ability to listen to others and understand where they’re coming from is an essential life skill. If you want to succeed in life, this is the most important section in this book. In fact, you’ll see that listening skills are referred to in later sections more often than any other topic.

Being a great listener is valuable because:
 
You find out what really matters to people. This means you’re better positioned to offer relevant advice, make well-informed decisions and positively influence people’s lives.
 
You help people think things through. When someone has a problem to solve, you can often help them identify a solution for themselves simply by listening to them and asking relevant questions. This is a truly magical benefit if you are their manager, especially if you don’t have the answer yourself!
 
You build stronger relationships. When you listen to someone, you show them respect and consideration, and this builds trust and empathy. This is true at work and at home.
 
It helps you remember the conversation. By being attentive throughout, you will remember all the important content without having to try.

To become a great listener, you just need to keep practicing the '5Ps’ approach:

Pay attention to show your interest and create better engagement:
- Maintain eye contact and keep smiling
- Nod and make affirming, encouraging sounds
- Avoid interrupting
- Focus on what the other person is saying
- Imagine what they are feeling

Probe to understand better by asking questions:
- 'Why do you say that?’
- 'Could you tell me more about that?’
- 'What are your thoughts on that?
- 'Are you comfortable with X?’
- 'What do you need from X?’

Pause to allow the truth to come out:
- Don’t fill silences
- Be patient - just wait for the other person to speak
- Some people need time before they’re ready to express important things
- What people really feel may come out after a surprisingly long pause 

Play back key points to show that you’ve been listening:
- Describe what you’ve understood about the person’s situation
- Include their feelings as well as the facts
- Use your own words to demonstrate that you’ve genuinely understood
- Use phrases like: 'It sounds like what you’re saying is X’

Present possibilities to identify solutions:
- Test the water by suggesting different scenarios
- Use questions like, ‘Would X be an acceptable outcome for you?’
- Or, 'What if X were to happen, instead of Y?’
- Ask what might work for them
- Avoid being patronising by telling the person what to do